10 Ways to Look Sexy Over 40

With Valentine's Day fast approaching, thoughts of dining by candlelight, toasting my one and only with crystal champagne flutes, giving heartfelt love notes and whispering sweet nothings are on my mind.

I want to do all of those things while looking alluring - sexy if you will -  for my husband. But the older I get, the less I know what that means to me...and to him.

It goes without saying that the sexy go-to clothes of my 20's and early 30's, like mini-skirts, tight jeans and midriff baring tops, are obviously not an option at 45.

So what is sexy on a woman over 40?

That was the topic of a recent conversation I had with a close friend. After spending some time speculating about skirt length, heel heights and necklines, we decided it best to just go straight to the source. So we each asked our husbands, two professional and educated men over 40 who have never met, what they thought made a woman of a certain age sexy to them.

And you know what? They came up with very similar answers.

Here are 10 things they think makes a woman over 40 look her sexiest*:

1) She wears form fitting clothing. Not tight, but fitted enough to show off her figure, her feminine curves. Hiding behind baggy, draping clothes is not sexy.

2) She doesn't show too much skin. Bare backs, plunging necklines and too much leg is a not appealing and gives off a "trying too hard" vibe.

3) Her skin and hair are well-taken care of.

4) She doesn't look like it takes hours to get dressed; an effortless look.

5) Taut arms, great legs, or sexy shoulders can be shown off in a tasteful way, but not all at once. She focuses on one special physical attribute at a time. It'll stand out better anyway.

6) It's easier to have a confident, sexy walk when not teeter-tottering on your shoes. She always wears shoes she can walk in, or even run in if she has to.

7) Her makeup is not heavy. Black eye makeup, goopy, messy lipstick and too much foundation can easily end up on his clothes and that is definitely not sexy.

8) Men like to run their fingers through our hair. Her hair is touchable, not stiff and full of gel and hair spray.

9) A bit of side-boob, revealing cut-outs and dresses with deep cut backs might look sexy on the red carpet but none of that usually translates well on a "regular" person like her.

GP looks hot!
But this dress would be laughable and inappropriate on me. 

10) She maintains a bit of mystery rather than revealing it all. A fitted, but not tight, T-shirt is much sexier than a blouse with a plunging neckline. The T-shirt leaves a little to the imagination.

Of course, sexiness is in the eye of the beholder. And being sexy is much more than a great fitting pair of jeans and feminine heels you can run in.

Being confident, elegant, well-spoken, kind and funny are what both men agree really makes a woman of any age sexy. But not trying too hard, maintaining some mystery, embracing your body's shape and taking great care of yourself can amp up your sexy quotient.

What do you think makes a woman over 40 look sexy? 

Happy Valentine's Day! 

XO, 

Adrienne 

*Please keep in mind that these are opinions of just two people. Interesting enough to share but certainly not representative of all men...or women.